Per my last blog post,
[...]I put a ton of pressure on myself with regards to writing. I push myself to create more when I have a fixation because I'm terrified the energy will run out. But the truth is that the world will not stop if I don't write for a while. I will not die. Nobody will hate me. And this is so difficult to accept.I still haven't managed to accept this. But I have a therapist now and that's what therapists are for.
Currently I'm working on two darlings while one darling is asleep. These are The Seduction of Gaius Baelsar (awake), Lavender and Time (awake), and Call Me (asleep). Chapter 70 of The Seduction is proceeding apace, while Lavender is kind of stuck because I need to play more of my second Wizard romance playthrough of Stardew Valley to take notes on/gather inspiration for/make up shit that happens in the fic. A really scary situation to be in. I don't like when I'm not flowing easily creativly. I don't like it at all. Huh? What's that? What quote from my previous blog post?
I finally took the plunge and made the leap to Scrivener as my writing software of choice. It took me like 10 hours total but I converted The Seduction and Lavender all the way over (I still haven't done Call Me yet but it's smaller then both of those by a large margin). Now I'm working on them both in that. I'm still retaining Obsidian as my notetaking app of choice, though, becuase it's just generally more robust than Scrivener for this. For outlining and writing, I'll go with Scrivener. For the data, I'll stick with Obsidian.
Read one fucking page of my book as I was out yesterday waiting on something. One. God help me I will finish this book one day.
Yesterday I went out and got a damn Costco membership finally, and got some glasses with them, too. The person who was helping me had me put on my final choices so she could measure the set of it against the center of my eye, which she said was really important because if you shift a delicate prescription like mine around much it throws things off. I've been getting glasses from my eye doctor for most of my life and they've never measured to the center of my eye for this. Have I been getting fucked over...?
I'm anxious about my choices, too. I wore one of them low on purpose because I needed to to be comfortable, but what if I'm not actually comfortable with the final product and I and up wearing it high all the time, which wasn't the measurement? I guess those were meant to be my spares but I joked that I was going to wear my spares more than my mains because of how cute they are on me. Whatever. We'll see.
Meanwhile, I had to trade in my work equipment for new work equipment. This was very stressful and I do not want to do it again for a long time. The IT guy was very nice, though - it was my first time talking to him one-on-one. He talked a lot about cryptocurrency though, so maybe he's not so nice... ðŸ˜
Elden Ring DLC came out one sleep ago. Everyone's playing it. I've decided that I'm going to retire from Soulslikes for the time being. I just don't have the stamina and determination for them anymore. What I'm hoping I do have determination for is FFXIV; Dawntrail comes out next week. I didn't take Friday off because that's the first day of early access and I suspect the process will be neither smooth nor pretty, but generally I should be able to dedicate my time to the game anyway. Otherwise I took the next Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday off. Plenty of time to finish the main plot and relax a little. My boss didn't ask me what I was doing for my 3 day vacation so I didn't have to make up something like "going to the beach :)" which is good.
All in all I've been doing well. Some mini scares lately. I'm sure things will get worse soon - and I mean this in a realistic way and not a doomer way. I see a couple of things on the horizon that'll tank things south if they happen. So we'll see.
Stay safe.